If you combine finances with a partner, give yourselves a personal allowance (joint accounts, budgeting, money)

When I first was married I thought the best way to manage money was have all of our finances combined (including personal spending money). I was absolutely convinced of this. We would learn to be perfectly united and act as one as we managed our money. I no longer believe this to be the case.

Issues with Having No Money to Call Your Own

When you have no money to call your own it is too easy, or conversely too difficult, to spend money on yourself. Those who find it easy to spend money themselves create waste from overspending. Those who find it difficult to spend money on themselves find dissatisfaction from restriction.  

When my wife and I married we combined our finances 100% because we thought that would be best. However, we quickly found I was great at justifying my purchases and finding the money in our budget to cover it. My wife, on the other hand, had a hard time justifying spending money on herself when it was considered family money. Neither of us were trying to coerce each other one way or another but we saw personal spending from different angles and it created dissatisfaction for both of us.

A Better Way

Giving yourselves an allowance creates freedom. You predetermine with your partner how much you want to give yourself for personal spending. You make a hard fast rule that everything dealing with personal spending comes from your personal accounts and everything dealing with joint spending comes from your joint accounts. This includes major items like cell phones, laptops, clothing, and personal emergencies. Both parties commit to living within their personal allowance. 

Creating two additional checking account for personal spending was liberating. It gave us a greater sense of responsibility in that it required us to think about our long-term personal wants and needs. It requires asking questions like, when will I need a new laptop, and can I make do on a cheaper cell phone plan so I have more money to spend on other things that are more rewarding? It has been a lot of fun. We enjoy our purchases more and have fun seeing the purchases of each other. 

Benefits

Because your personal spending money is truly separate you do not care how your spouse spends it and you feel complete freedom to spend it how you like. Maybe you like to save and make big purchases or maybe you like to enjoy making small purchases along the way. It doesn't matter. You now have the complete freedom to choose. 

You find yourself weighing more heavily what you want to spend your money on because your allowance is limited and you make better, more satisfying decisions.

One of the best financial decisions we have made it to give ourselves a personal allowance.